complicated relationships

[beige_alert]

I always thought that a poly group marriage sounded really complicated, but Joyce has been telling me about the relationship train wrecks that various members of her family have been having while pretending to be monogamous, and now two husbands, a wife, and a wife-in-law seems downright simple by comparison.

Moral of the story: If you are not being monogamous, don’t pretend! (And if you can’t be good, be careful, and if you can’t be careful, try to keep it down to five or six verses.)

Comments

[jrittenhouse.livejournal.com]

What's not natural is being expected to behave as though one person you're currently interested in is your eternal soulmate, to whom you're so strongly attached that there is no room in your heart to love or desire anyone else.

I don't consider that to be the case when you're casually dating someone. I do think that the 'no room in your heart' better apply to someone you're supposed to be committed to.

As to the single=second class situation, I understand your point. But in the case of a family, you're entrusted by the powers that be with a child. You have the responsibility to look after that kid, and take care of them when they're sick, etc. You don't have a lot of choice in the matter. Same thing would apply to you if you were a single dad or guardian. Or if you were taking care of an ill parent. As to social activities, at a certain age, yeah, people make different allowances for *whatever is the norm*. I went to my 20th reunion for high school, and they had a family picnic as part of it. No such thing this year (30th) because the vast majority of the people have grown kids if they have kids at all.